The young maiden is in the waxing crescent moon phase of her life. She is an explorer. She is inquisitive about life and love.
The mother is the full moon. She is ripe and fertile. She is the creative life force of our very existence.
The crone is the waning crescent moon. She has deep wisdom to share and hands that heal.
Last year I made the transition from maiden to mother. Before I experienced this rite of passage many people told me it would change my life. I nodded along like I knew. I thought I knew and, in many ways, I did know.
I knew that I was standing on the brink.
I knew that I was ready to embark on a huge transformation.
I knew that there would be things that I had yet to understand.
What I didn’t know was the extent of this fiery and sacred transition.
I am no stranger to change. I went through some defining life changes during the maiden chapter of my life. However, the transition to motherhood is one of the most universal and yet most misunderstood changes that a woman will make.
Now that I look back on myself as a maiden it feels like I am an observer of that young woman. I led a full and adventurous maiden voyage! However, I am not on that path anymore. I don’t feel sad or bitter because I know that I completely fulfilled my purpose as a maiden.
The night that I gave birth to my daughter was my initiation into motherhood. It was intense and I still think about it almost every day. In those hours, I waved farewell to my maiden self and welcomed in my mother self.
The transition from maiden to mother does not have to be the biological act of giving birth. There may be some other defining moment where you make your transition. For example, the death of your own Mother may bring you into the realm of your motherhood phase.
I was talking to a friend recently about her struggle to define her identity as a new mother. She feels the same as she did before she had a baby but she feels different. I completely understood her. It is hard to put it into words but there is something so powerful and yet unspeakably intangible about the transformative power of shifting from maiden to mother.
Yes, I am still the same.
But I am different.
I feel like I have more depth now.
I am full of the wisdom that comes from completing the most ancient rite of passage a woman can make.
I spent the first year of motherhood going through a profound healing. All the buried emotions from my maiden self rose to the surface in the depths of the long sleepless nights that I experienced as a new mother.
I thought I had completed my healing but I soon realised that I had only scratched the surface.
I had to clear out the old to make way for the new.
I am now in my second year of motherhood and I feel like I am starting to emerge from a very fast spin cycle that has cleansed me to my core!
Giving birth has a funny way of making you think about death and it forces you to confront the way you approach your life as you look ahead to the crone years.
Accepting that the maiden cycle has ended is not easy but I have learnt that holding onto the past will ultimately hold you back from achieving your full potential as a mother. Once you have moved through this rite of passage there is no going back. The maiden years are gone but what lies ahead is the ripe and fertile land of the mother!